A Day to Trust or Walk Away

"Throughout the history of God's people as given to us in the Bible, we see that life is a test. We have before us the option to trust God "no matter what," or to walk away from Him. To walk away from God is to leave the fragments of our dreams in pieces on the floor, but to trust Him is to let God pick up the pieces and make us whole again. When we choose to let Him make us whole again, he will make our lives more beautiful than before." What I Learned from God While Quilting Ruth McHaney Danner & Cristine Bolley


When I read this quote earlier today, I immediately thought back to a day in March during my sophomore year at college. I had sought out a place called Memorial Park (photo above) near my university campus because there were some decisions weighing on me that I wanted to sort out. In fact, I had been searching for this very park throughout my freshman and sophomore years because it was one that my dad used to take me to as a small child when my parents attended UGA. I did not go to the park that day to seek God. He wasn't really part of my life at that time and I was unsure that He even existed. Looking back, I can say that He was definitely there as I sat on that bench and thought things out.

It was a drizzly, cold afternoon and the park was completely deserted on the day that I rediscovered the park of my childhood. Renovations were in progress and it was in the process of becoming a park that I would not have recognized if I had come a week later. As I shivered from the dampness, I began to pray, even though I could not have explained why I felt the need to do something that I felt was powerless. After about half an hour of weeping and praying, I was pretty sure that He was indeed real and that I knew the direction that He wanted me to take . Peace settled on me like a comfy blanket in front of a roaring fire and I felt that I could leave the park that day with my decision firmly made. As I rose to begin the uphill walk to my car, I spotted something that made me pause. Across the pond, I spotted part of an old playground set made out of logs that was being torn down to make way for a shiny, new play set. Memories came flooding back as I remembered laughing with my dad and climbing on that very same equipment as a three year old. He and I had unearthed worms in our front yard and walked to the park to "fish" in the murky water from the bridge. As the picture of that child playing happily with her father became clearer, God's presence began to cloud over as I pushed Him away. At that moment, I knew that if I chose God's direction, I would never win my dad's approval again. We had drifted apart throughout my childhood and finding this park was my effort to figure out why there was a divide between us. At the end of that afternoon before I left for my home, I chose my earthly father over my Heavenly Father. It was a decision that would turn out to be a drastic turning point in my life.

Several years ago, I finally yielded to God and allowed Him to pick up the pieces. He led me to share my testimony with a body of believers. At first, I was terrified to speak publicly, but I once again felt that comforting presence that can only come from God. He sustained me through that morning at church and I know without a doubt that it was exactly what I was led to do. I am thankful that those pieces of me have been put back together in way that has a heart for the Lord. There has been some doubt on my part since I shared my story, but only during those times that I have tried to take back the reins of my life. I am very blessed to have several encouraging people in my circle that have seen me through those faltering moments. Most of all, I am glad that God did not walk away from me when I deliberately strode away from Him!

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28(NIV)